It’s about respect

Please read.

I don’t post this stuff for sympathy. I post to advocate for ALL people with disabilities. I post so everyone knows what it’s like. I mean you all don’t go to disability websites, blogs, Facebook pages etc to learn unless something happens to someone you know or love. Well, guess what, everyone needs to know this stuff so everyone can help to make it better.

If you see someone parked illegally in a handicap space; REPORT IT to the police, not the store. They don’t care. I mean, Walmart changed out a bunch of handicap spaces and made them into spaces for people running in and out to their pharmacy. I get it during Covid when pharmacy employees had to be running in/out to deliver, but now? Lazy people park there so they’re closer to the doors if they’re going to the pharmacy or not plus shopping the entire store so the space isn’t available for an hour. Clinics pharmacies put up those spaces, too, but they only allow parking in those spaces IF an employee is bringing out your medicine. ONLY!!!!!!!!!!!! Can people just stop being SO lazy? 3 of those spots were taken up by vehicles WITH proper handicap parking stuff at Walmart today. GOOD FOR THEM!!!!!!! Show people who SHOULD be able to park there.

If you see youth playing on the electric shopping carts YELL AT THEM EVEN IF THEY’RE NOT YOUR KID! The last 5 times I’ve gone to Walmart there have been NONE available and 4 or 5 of them marked Do Not Use: broken. Target has always had one available or tries to find one for you. Leukens? Usually has some available. Marketplace had one available. NO other stores in town have them. Not sure if Home Depot or Menards or Fleet do, but I’ve never seen any available.

See kids (or asshole adults) pounding the button to open the door electronically or simply standing there repeatedly pushing the button? TELL THEM TO STOP!!!!! Ask them if they know how difficult it is to get in a door using crutches or wheelchair, etc, when those buttons are SO OFTEN broken? Tell them they SHOULD CARE because it will be their grandparents, a family member, or a friend who WILL need those buttons some day.

I understand now why my Mom has been refusing the wheelchair for 25 years. It totally takes away your independence! It causes pain to use! (At least for people with multiple medical disabilities.) And she has a husband to help her.I am lamenting the loss of independence and self-ability (is that a word?) I didn’t want to be in a wheelchair at 52, almost 53. No one does. Being single really doesn’t help. I don’t have a partner to help push a cart so I can roll the chair. Take Aidan with me? Sometimes (OK, a lot) I really just want to get my errands done without worrying how bad his anxiety is at that moment. I just can’t do it without him anymore. I realized that today. Had a momentary crying jag in the car of physical pain and emotional frustration. Then told myself to stop and just accept it.

After the fiasco of trying to get my temporary handicap parking permit (back and forth 3 times to clinic to DVS,) on my crutches; I am in SO much pain now. Plus, slipping on ice on crutches makes your back twist. Not fun. I HATE ice melt crystals due to the impact on the environment but USING IT IS NECESSARY. It’s not just a nice thing to do that very few stores use beyond their front door. You CAN’T use a wheelchair on ice! That’s a whole new concept of “sit and spin.” LOL. Walkers, canes, crutches on ice? ASKING FOR PEOPLE TO HAVE A BAD FALL. Please ask your stores to use ice melt on their sidewalks and maybe even around handicap parking spaces.

Walk Safe This Winter – Newsletter – Orofino Physical Therapy

ALSO, snow/ice from shoes/boots tracking in/out of stores NEEDS TO BE WIPED UP ASAP!!!! I almost wiped out slipping on my crutches on melted “water” at 3 places today. Businesses in northern states should just KNOW that once the sleet and snow falls they need to have at least one employee on each shift mopping up water all day long. Is it a sucky job, sure, but do you want your customers to come back? Do you want to be sued, or at the very least have to pay for someone’s medical bills? When you’re on Medical Assistance and go to a doctor for an injury they send you a questionairre EVERY TIME asking if you got injured at home or elsewhere. If MA can get out of paying a bill they will go after the place where you got hurt – even a friend’s or family member’s home.

I'm scared to go outside because my crutches slip on all this rain, ice and

Honestly, people still stare???!!!! I thought people had got passed the whole staring at someone in a wheelchair. I’ve never had SO many people openly gawking at me and talking about me until today (that I know of, tee hee. Let’s not think back to some of my hair color choices.) I was pushing a cart while wheeling the wheelchair. OMG must stare at that person!!! No, it wasn’t easy. Do you KNOW how difficult it is to go around corners with one hand? I was doing pretty good. Had the cart hooked on the front joint of the foot steps of the chair so I could go in straight lines. Not too bad. Had to lift the cart off every time I had to turn a corner. I saw 3 other people in wheelchairs, but they had grandchildren or husbands pushing their carts. 3 other people asked if they could help me. ALL OF THEM WERE AT LEAST 80 YEARS OLD and walking slowly themselves.

Place For People With Disabilities - 'It's Rude Not To Stare' A smart copy  twist on a familiar phrase champions the brilliant athletes competing in  the Paralympic Games #paralympics #games | Facebook

I had SO MANY more people push their carts out in front of me or walking out in front of me making me have to suddenly stop. PEOPLE ARE JUST SO RUDE AND UNCARING! Even at the self-checkout the Walmart employee just stood their and watched my struggling to check and bag my groceries. All my 5 items. Grrrrr. What are they being paid for anyway?

A poem i wrote. (C) SJB #disability #disabilities #poem #poetry  #poetsofinstagram #SJBpoetry | Writing groups, Words, Poetic quote

There were nice moments. When I got stuck between the door to the milk jugs and my cart a lady stepped in to help. When I was leaving the store pushing the cart with my chair a young man who had already entered the store turned around to help me get to my car. He said his grandfather had been in a chair. He understood. Then when I was lifting the chair unstably into the car the elderly lady in the car next to me came to help. With my feet in so much pain my balance is shot to hell.

17 tips for talking to and acting around a person with a disability - Rare  Gems Blog

Maybe it’s due to growing up with a disabling disease that most family members had. Maybe my parents just raised us better. My siblings and I ALWAYS stop to ask if someone needs help. We hold open doors. We reach for items for others. Common courtesy is gone. Now people would rather video you on their phone and laugh. People with disabilities just have to think outside the box and figure out how to do things on our own in a world built for healthy physically fit people obsessed with themselves.

Common Courtesy by Steve Gergley - FICTION on the WEB short stories

We need it too

Sept. being chronic pain month, I’m going to broach yet another taboo topic. Sex. Humans are sexual beings. We are made in a way to enjoy it. If we weren’t supposed to enjoy it we wouldn’t have those receptors that give pleasure. This is yet one more thing to add to the list of things you often can’t do when you live with chronic pain. If you do, you often can’t enjoy it.

Sexuality: A Critical Component of Quality of Life in Chronic Disease -  Nursing Clinics

There are medical pills to aid those with problems getting to arousal, keeping arousal, not being too dry, and other sexual difficulties. But if doing it hurts somewhere that has nothing to do with sexual organs, well you’re just not going to enjoy it and there’s no medical help except pain pills that often lessen the pleasurable feelings.

Stomach Pain After Sex: Why Women Experience Abdominal Pain After Sex or  Intercourse

This is where I say Yay for sexual aids “toys” and even humans that can help who won’t judge. Yep, I mean prostitutes. You can buy a human who won’t judge you for your looks and doesn’t know you or care about pain, but their job is to give pleasure. It’s not talked about much even among those of us with chronic pain, but as a social worker I know such companions ARE used by people with disabilities and chronic pain. Yet society judges that you are buying it or taking advantage of the sex worker and you are bad.

If you’ve never had a disability or injury that’s caused you to lose use of an arm or hand or it causes incredible pain to use it, then you have no idea how much sex is missed. Well, not sex, but the arousal and orgasms. If you can’t arouse yourself manually how else are you supposed to? Sex toys and/or a sex worker.

I read books by an author who includes in her series, that is futuristic, government licensed companions. LC’s have rules to follow, like health care and physicals to keep their license. They aren’t supposed to use illegal drugs. However they can use drugs designed to enhance the sexual experience if the client wants it. Oftentimes LC’s will get training in the social sciences; psychology, or sex counseling for couples, etc. Yes, there are those of “lower caliber” who work the streets, but they still have those rules to follow. There are those who cater to the rich who have those degrees in psych or business. What I’m saying is, they are an accepted part of society. Accepted as something that is necessary, and lessens the amount of sex crimes too. They enjoy giving pleasure to the client. It’s a job. Many are married.

Personally, I think the world would be a better place with Licensed Companions. Even low income people can afford them. Many times people with disabilities or chronic pain are low income. There wouldn’t be the fear of judgement or catching diseases. The quality of life of a person who can’t manually give themself pleasure would increase. Happiness would increase. Some of you are thinking, well just use the sex toys. Again, if you can’t use your hand?

Michael Kaplan Sex Quotes | QuoteHD

Are people with disabilities supposed to never have or enjoy sex or those pleasurable feelings? And don’t, just don’t bring religion into the discussion. The ONLY religion that says sex is only for procreation is Christianity. I’ve only ever heard christians say you’re not supposed to enjoy it. That’s bullshit. If you actually know history then you know Romans and Greeks used prostitutes, because husbands were only allowed to have sex with their wives at certain times, etc. Many histories/cultures had prostitutes as people of status in society.

Touch, Sex and Disability in the time of COVID-19 – Handi

I’ve had the prostitute discussion and the porn discussion with many of my friends and social work colleagues. Some think there’s no way to have it without the person being abused. The hooker, stripper, or whoever HAD to be forced into it somehow. It can never be a good choice to sell yourself. I also know some women and men who enjoy their good looks and their sensuality and WANT to be a stripper, etc, enjoy giving others pleasure. Some simply enjoy that powerful feeling sex can give us.

Why should people in pain or disabled be denied feeling sexual? Modern society needs to get rid of the taboos around talking about healthy sex. Surely virtual reality will come up with something soon.

The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability | Shirley Ryan AbilityLab

Not complaining all the time . . .

This Keto business takes up a lot of time. I discovered eggs are the go-to for breakfast. I’m not into eggs enough to eat them every fricken day. So I did my due diligence and googled for other keto breakfast ideas and found grain-free oatmeal (will it taste good?) and many types of granola type breakfast “cereals” to make. Again, will they TASTE GOOD and not have weird texture? I am a cereal lover. Goddess PLEASE make these taste good!!! Reading through all these online recipes I’ve discovered it will take a good amount of time doing prep, chopping, etc.

Over the years I have looked for recipes so I wouldn’t have to put in time standing at the counter doing prep. Prep HURTS! The chopping, cutting, etc doesn’t mix well with arthritis and carpal tunnel and the standing is horrible for my hips and back. I’ve bought gadgets to use to do the prep for me, but ya can’t always use said gadget AND it makes more items to wash. Standing to wash dishes also hurts.

It really sounds like I am just a whiner, huh? I really do want to change my eating habits to diabetic healthy, but I also live with a lot of daily chronic pain. Most people really don’t understand how these common household “chores” such as cooking a meal can really hurt. It sort of defeats the purpose of wanting to eat/cook healthy if you’re in too much pain after cooking to actually eat it and also can’t get back up to do the dishes and cleanup. It really makes a person just rather not eat. Seriously, this last week I’ve been going hungry instead of cooking. It’s been a bad pain week. I’ve been eating keto bomb meal replacement bars instead. And they’re expensive. Plus, I have a pantry full of white rice, white pasta, canned vegies, and canned fruit from the food shelf that I’m apparently not supposed to eat.

It’s bad enough that I feel like a loser who can’t get things done around the house and yard that NEED done and now I’m supposed to add all this cooking prep? People with medical disabilities are simply not supposed to be poor and alone. I HATE complaining about pain, but it is a part of my life. I feel so down about myself and think of people I know with cancer or other worse than I ailments who somehow manage to get up and cook, then I feel worse. I think of all the elderly and frail people in the world who are poor and alone and I really wonder why our society doesn’t offer help unless you pay or are part of a church? I’m 23 years younger than my parents who are both in huge amounts of pain. It makes me feel like a bad daughter that I can’t be there to do things for them. I know, somehow, between the both of them they manage to cook meals. I also know that afterwords in the evenings they sit in pain. A man who spent his life using his hands to make beautiful homes and other carpentry work then driving a truck now can barely hold a book at times. Mom has to wear a battery operated heating vest at all times to help the pain she takes opiates to lessen. How do they have any kind of life? They force themselves to do, to drive, to still volunteer.

Quality of life is a huge thing. Most people take it for granted. Most people don’t have to take pain medication to function. Some people take opiates illegally and make it hard for those of us who need it to get it. My chronic pain doc again mentioned medical marijuana. I can’t afford it. Aidan’s doc mentioned it to him, too. We could get the cards, but then have to drive to Brainerd to get the products, causing more pain. Right now we’ve been taking Delta 8 gummies, since I get a discount at the store. That’s one of the reasons I wanted to work there. I need the money and their products, but this last week has been difficult to work through my pain and not show it to customers. Can’t take D8 at work, or Tramadol.

So I come home and take stuff for pain and nothing gets done around the house or yard and I can’t stand up long enough to cook. At the pool I’ve gone from pushing myself to do cardio to just trying to use the pool to help alleviate pain with slow stretches. With my glucose at 116 I have to lose weight, but exercise brings on more pain so eating different is going to have to work.

Exercise Hurts | Funny Workout" Poster by BootsBoots | Redbubble

I wonder how many times I’m going to burn and cut myself with this food prep while on Tramadol? Maybe I should just take out stock in these keto bomb meal replacement bars. I am SO very grateful to Rebecca Strong Schultz for coming to help clean the house last week. Hmmm, who wants to come help do food prep? LOL, naw, that would have to be weekly and Who can afford that? It’s OK to let the house and yard work go for a while, only I know how long the floors go without a mopping. No one else needs to know. Just know, the next time you see dirty kids in a store or drive by a yard that needs cleaned up or mowed that you have no idea what those people might be dealing with: pain and/or mental health issues. Try not to judge and maybe donate to a local nonprofit. Pain sucks.

Mommy Advocate General

A Parent Advocate Sued Anywhere Is A Parent Advocate Sued Everywhere –  Volume & Light Nashville

It doesn’t stop when I’m tired. It doesn’t stop when I’m sick. It doesn’t stop when I’m broken. It never stops. Once you are a mother of a child with special needs; you are their advocate for life.

You are their lifeline. Their voice.

I knew he would be born with the same degenerative rare connective tissue disease that I have. My genes would give that to him. I didn’t know I would never have my own life. Even after he’s legally an adult. He and I got so much more than just the one disease.

Challenges and Issues for Special Needs Children

From birth it began; paperwork. It. Has. Never. Stopped. How do you layer-down a human life to reams and reams of paperwork. It started with a simple printout: FRAGILE, Handle With Care. It didn’t matter that I was lying there in pain, not only from childbirth but from my own medical difficulties with the disease we’d share. I had to forget about me and yell at a nurse for the way she was yanking on my son’s legs.

Then we began Early Head Start, a preschool program, with more paperwork. Medical proof that my child would be full of bruises because that’s part of our symptoms. I had to prove that I wasn’t harming my child and the bruises weren’t abuse. His first broken leg at 10 months old wasn’t abuse. Start the paper trail. Keep all the medical files.

Osteogenesis Imperfecta: Brittle Bone Disease - Creative Med Doses

OH but if that would have been all of it! No, not for me. I had to hit the jackpot and my kid would also have ADHD, tons of anxiety, and years of depression. Anger management over not being “normal,” more broken bones thanks to hyperactivity, and a fear of playing; because when he plays he fractures.

Public school begins with more paperwork. We instututed a 504 Plan for my medically fragile child. That wasn’t enough. It didn’t take long before the school was “suggesting” medication for the ADHD. So educational assessments were done and the 504 Plan was changed to and IEP: Individual Education Plan. I was a Licensed professional therapist, a social worker, but who was there for me? Who helped me with all this new paperwork, assessments, tests, etc?

No one.

Cuz I’m also a single mom. A single mom with my own disabilities. On my own.

Then when he was in 4th grade he fell 10 feet off a garage. He broke his back in 2 places and punctured a lung. Try watching your heart being flown on a helecopter 4 hours away from you to an emergency Children’s Hospital! My heart, my child, unconscious flying away.

DSM-5 Criteria for Diagnosing Generalized Anxiety Disorder

After those 6 frantic days ensued a year of medical appointments and me, alone, lifting him, turning him, carrying him; while I had 5 herniated discs of my own. Driving 8 hours once a month to see the specialist. Dealing with his pain, and the school being an unnecessary extra pain in my back side.

By 6th grade the school decided they didn’t know how to deal with him. Do what schools do: label the child difficult. His grades were failing even though his intelligence is above average. I made the plans for his IEP because his special education “teacher” didn’t know how to do it right. They sent him to In-School Suspension when he was having an anxiety attack for Pete’s sake! So many things were going wrong, so I threatened to sue the school.

So Much Paperwork for New Professional Job Fields — Steemit

It shouldn’t take threats to get what you need for your child. I took him out of public school and enrolled him in a Charter school. Low-and-behold he became a person. He was no longer just a number and some labelled terms on forms. OH, it wasn’t easy. He still made our lives a challenge, but what the public school labeled as failing he was now getting good grades and making friends.

Not perfect A’s. He still needed a LOT of special education assistance, but he had happy moments for a change. In 10th grade he even had a girlfriend! I had a bubbling busy house full of teen boys that made me laugh for days. Ah, could he possibly see a future on the horizon?

A young man is supposed to start his independent life at age 18, after graduation. My son was headed in the right direction. He had a part time job working with computers, his love. He had a good bicycle and friends. He will never drive a car, but he was on his way!

Then the real world decided it needed to stomp us down again. The disease roared to life and he suddenly became a shell of himself. Living his days in extreme pain and inability to be mobile, he lost his job. He tried this that and the next thing to get better, but he’s not going to get better.

Understanding Chronic Pain

Without me he would be living in a box on the street, but I will never allow that. His depression and anxiety is now through the roof, as is his daily levels of physical pain. I’m trying to get him on SS Disability, but the “system” seems to think that due to his age he should be able to work. How can they not SEE the boy who so wants to be a man, but he can’t catch a break?

22 years old and I’m still in charge of his life. I have my SSDisability and my own difficulties, but being his advocate is never going to end. I love him to the ends of the universe and back, but how much do I give of myself and never get help for?

Mom’s never stop.

Covid-19

The government is already breaking in the the stockpiled items. Blood is at a critical shortage. Medical workers don’t have the protection they need: masks, gowns, gloves. This is in the US AND WORLDWIDE.

The US so-called “President” is a joke during all of this.

Whether or not you follow the CDC guidelines, YOU CAN STILL GET SICK. Some hospitals are having to make triage decisions about who can and who can’t get treatment.

Poor Italy.

I am one of the high risk. I have asthma. IF I get sick at any time of the year, it always turns into bronchitis. If I get this? I WILL get pneumonia. My mother has worse asthma than I do. I don’t want her to get pneumonia.

Yes. I am staying home. I usually stay home a lot anyway, but now? Most of the reasons and events I would have gone out for have been cancelled.

I am not a worry-wort type of person. I usually believe in taking risks. My son has extreme anxiety all the time. Right now he won’t leave the house. He even cancelled a doctor appointment I wish he would have gone to. He says he doesn’t want to bring anything home because of my asthma.

53% of Americans still don’t think this is an emergency situation. All of those people are not staying home. They don’t care about the high risk people. The fact that the number of people affected by this virus doubles and triples daily doesn’t get to them. It will when someone they know tests positive, but not before. They are selfish. Period.

It only took 3 months for this virus to become a pandemic. In comparison to other historic pandemics this IS a bad one; if only because the rest didn’t take place during our modern medicine capabilities. People like to compare it to the Sars, or other, epidemics, but it’s capability to effect millions has already surpassed them.

Am I sitting at home worrying about it? Not yet. Not for myself. However I do worry about people I know who are at high risk. So few numbers of people are actually getting tested WHEN they are sick. People are told to stay at home even if they’re sick and they are NOT getting tested. So the numbers of affected people really is a larger number than what the news says.

For now we’re OK here in my house. We have a lot to keep us busy. I have a house full of books. We have ample food for humans and cats. Possibly not enough cat litter and TP. I didn’t go out an hoard ANYTHING when others were, so now I can’t find TP anywhere.

I don’t care what other people say. I think this is a historic time. Life as we know it is changing before our eyes. What side of history will you be on?

Now. Remember to tip the deliver people. Wash your hands with SOAP.

 

For the Men

“Eleven states have passed laws restricting a woman’s access to abortion, with some states approving near-total bans of the procedure altogether. Alabama, Arkansas, Georgia, Indiana, Kentucky, Mississippi, Missouri, North Dakota, Ohio and Utah have all passed abortion-related legislation that has been signed by their Republican governors. Lousiana’s Democratic Governor John Bel Edwards also signed a bill restricting abortions.

Alabama’s law, signed by Governor Kay Ivey, is likely the strictest in the nation as it makes it a felony for doctors to perform abortions even in cases of rape and incest. Laws passed in Georgia, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi and Ohio ban abortion after a fetal heartbeat is detected, which can happen as early as six weeks into pregnancy (before many women are even aware they are pregnant). Less severe laws like those in Indiana and North Dakota ban the use of clamps and forceps during second-trimester abortions.

According to a new FiveThirtyEight analysis, which examined all 50 state of the state speeches given by governors in 2019, the term “reproductive health” was not uttered once by a Republican. Meanwhile, the term appeared in approximately 21.7 percent of Democratic speeches.

https://www.newsweek.com/republican-governors-reproductive-health-abortion-laws-1443902

The U.S. Supreme Court, in Roe v. Wade, made it clear that states may not ban abortion outright before the fetus is determined to be viable, recognized by the medical community as around 24 weeks’ gestation. In addition, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled in Planned Parenthood v. Casey that states may not place an undue burden on a woman’s right to choose an abortion. Like laws that attempt to ban abortion at 20 weeks’ gestation, bills banning abortion after detection of a fetal heartbeat are intended as a direct challenge to these U.S. Supreme Court decisions.

Let me be razor clear why all these states are even proposing abortion bans right now, even if they don’t get passed or they remain being argued over in session for long periods. They WANT to be taken to the Supreme Court. Their target IS Roe-vs-Wade. They want people to think that their are a lot of people who want to overturn it.

THERE ARE NOT.

Polls being done put Americans in total at about 50% in favor of keeping Roe just where it’s at and another 30% in favor of keeping it but tweaking it just a bit, and the last 20 % being unsure OR for overturning. Even polls among republicans show 1/3 in favor of keeping Roe and another 1/3 in favor of keeping it but tweaking it, with only the last 1/3 being the radical fundamentalists who want it overturned.

Many of these abortion bills are called “heartbeat” bills. How do you detect a heartbeat in an unborn fetus? (I’ll explain later that at the gestational stage these bills cover it is not a fetus, it is still an embryo.) By using a VERY INTRUSIVE and embarrassing measure at 6 weeks:

Ohio required an abortion provider to use an abdominal ultrasound to detect a fetal heartbeat and banned abortion when the pregnancy has progressed to 12 weeks and a fetal heartbeat is detected. North Dakota went even further, passing the most stringent anti-choice legislation in the country—a bill that bans abortion as soon as a fetal heartbeat can be detected using “acceptable medical practice,” which is approximately six weeks through the use of a transvaginal ultrasound.

At least sixteen states (Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Kentucky, LouisianaMaryland, MichiganMinnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, New York, Ohio, South Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, and West Virginia) have introduced measures to ban abortion as early as six weeks into a pregnancy.

MN, where I live, is what concerns me. I am 50 years old and Peri-menopausal. No I don’t plan on getting pregnant any time soon, but this is where I live and as long as I do it is no one’s business to tell me or any other woman what to do with my/her health, rights, or body. I will fight for my fellow women.

Minnesota Fetal Heartbeat Abortion Ban (HF 271)  , proposed  Jan 22, 2019

Minnesota Fetal Heartbeat Abortion Ban (SF 869) , proposed Feb 7, 2019

Minnesota Fetal Heartbeat Abortion Ban (HF 2101) , proposed March 7 2019

Minnesota Fetal Heartbeat Abortion Ban (SF 2245) , proposed March 11 2019

Some reproductive rights groups argue that the term “heartbeat” bill is a misnomer, since the fetus does not yet have a heart at six weeks’ gestation — the cardiac activity detectable at that time comes from tissue called the fetal pole. Up to the 10th week after fertilization the pregnancy is called an embryo and it still has no brain or spinal cord. Most malformations (birth defects) occur during this period when organs are forming. During this period, the embryo is most vulnerable to the effects of drugs, radiation, and viruses. Not until after 10 weeks is it called a fetus. It is still not viable, it can NOT live outside the uterus.

At about 14 weeks the sex of the fetus can be identified. Between 16 to 20 weeks the mother can finally feel the fetus move. Sometimes for women who don’t have regular periods, are overweight or don’t know why they are gaining weight – this is the first sign that they are pregnant. Not until after 24 weeks does the fetus have a chance of survival outside the uterus. The lungs continue to mature until near the time of delivery. The brain accumulates new cells throughout pregnancy and the first year of life after birth, but the people who want ALL fetuses born no matter what don’t care about their health care after they are born. Even if they need extreme medical care for underdeveloped lung and brain problems.

Nor do they care if the mother has medical issues during pregnancy. Make her suffer through it, no matter what, and deliver that fetus. Even if she KNOWS her body isn’t doing its job to give the fetus the required nutrients or safety/cushioning or whatever. Even if that mother feels like shit knowing her body is harming her child from her own medical issues. It takes two people to GET pregnant, even IF the pregnancy was a “mistake.” However, now what she’s going through is all on her. REMEMBER, THE ACTUAL TERM, REPRODUCTIVE HEALTH, NEVER GETS MENTIONED!

This issue is all about being educated and informed. It is NOT about being pro or anti birth or children or about killing. Those words are for the fanatics and lunatics and the super-religious. In NO way do politics and religion belong in the same debate for ANY topic. THIS is a medical and personal topic.

When it comes to abortion some people have morals and some people don’t. I have known women who use it as birth control. Got pregnant? Oh, go get an abortion. Got pregnant again? Just go have another abortion. Never feeling any emotion about it. Oh, had too many so that there’s so much scar tissue that you can’t get pregnant any more? Oh well, never wanted kids anyway. I have also known SO many more women that have had abortions that have felt the weight of the world on their shoulders at having had to get an abortion that they thought it would emotionally kill them to do it. The levels of guilt and self-hatred, shame, and disgust and depression left them in despair for years, but they had such heart-wrenching reasons for having to do it: usually being in violently abusive relationships, being molested by family members, being gang-raped, other rape, severe medical issues, or severe poverty or no medical or health care.

People of color, queer, and low-income people are who are disproportionately likely to seek abortion care. Then add in people with cognitive or physical/medical disabilities. And now these new laws could allow women who terminate pregnancies to be charged with murder!

Think about the barely mobile disabled person with cognitive disabilities who says yes to sex, but doesn’t really even know what sex is. That person can in no way raise a child, but will be forced to go through the pregnancy not understanding what is going on with her body, often doing things that put the fetus at risk. If she does, she will be arrested for causing the fetus harm? Many LGTBQ+ are beaten/raped just to “show them what they’re ‘supposed’ to be,” by ignorant assholes. Now they must carry a baby even though they look like a man? I could go on with the horrible stories. The fanatics don’t care who got pregnant or how or what will happen to the child after it is born. All they want to do is toss around scare-words without real facts.

“Late-term” abortions are generally understood to take place during or after the 21st to 24th week of gestation, which is late in the second trimester. That gestational period roughly corresponds to the point of “fetal viability” or when a fetus might be able to survive outside the womb with or without medical assistance. However, there is no precise medical or legal definition of “late-term,” and many doctors and scientists avoid that language, calling it imprecise and misleading. They say “late-term” may imply that these abortions are taking place when a woman has reached or passed a full-term pregnancy, which is defined as starting in the 37th week.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about 1.3 percent of abortions were performed at or greater than 21 weeks of gestation in 2015. In contrast, 91.1 percent were performed at or before 13 weeks and 7.6 percent at 14 to 20 weeks.

The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) said in a statement released this week that pregnant women may experience conditions such as “premature rupture of membranes and infection, preeclampsia, placental abruption, and placenta accreta” late in pregnancy that may endanger their lives.

 

“Women in these circumstances may risk extensive blood loss, stroke, and septic shock that could lead to maternal death. Politicians must never require a doctor to wait for a medical condition to worsen and become life-threatening before being able to provide evidence-based care to their patients, including an abortion,” the ACOG said.

In a paper published in 2013 by Foster and Katrina Kimport on women who got abortions for reasons other than a danger to life or health or a fetal anomaly, they cited logistical delays such as difficulty finding a provider, raising funds for the procedure and travel costs.

Foster and Kimport described five “profiles” of women in the study: “They were raising children alone, were depressed or using illicit substances, were in conflict with a male partner or experiencing domestic violence, had trouble deciding and then had access problems, or were young and [experiencing their first pregnancy].”

“one woman was told by her doctors that something in her 20-week scan looked suspicious but it wasn’t until 24 weeks that it was clear the fetus had significant abnormalities.”

(Oops, I forgot to add what the article was that I took the above quotes from. My bad.)

Humiliation, agony, and the risk of sterility or death. Is that what we want to go back to? That’s what women went through before Roe-vs-Wade in the 50’s and 60’s. Back room abortions with dirty medical instruments or at home do-it-yourself by a coat hanger. Just because they want to make it illegal doesn’t mean women will stop doing it. Women will still want to keep their fortune 500 jobs. They can’t do that if they get pregnant. Ah-ha!

There it is. The Ah Ha moment. That’s what this is all about! Men trying to put women in our place. Take away our power. Get us out of the business and other work-places so men can be back in charge. They want to go back to the 50’s when women met them at the front door with their evening drink and dinner on the table.

That will actually be impossible to do. No one in the middle class down can live like that. It’s mandatory for family’s to have both parents working just to pay the bills. Think about having kids? You’d better not have a part time or a low-income job if you have a kid or two. Need to dish out $5,000 for an abortion? Insurance will only pay for it if it’s medically necessary.

I would really like to see someone do a poll/survey on the middle class to upper class to find out how many of them have abortions -vs- the middle to lower class, where most surveys are usually done via social services or Planned Parenthood. They wouldn’t have to scrape and scrimp and save every penny for months just to afford the abortion. They could just think, “oh shit I’m pregnant, oops! Better get an abortion before mommy and daddy find out. Boom. Done.”  Plus, the family doc of rich people isn’t going to rat out some little rich kid. He knows who pays for his “coke.”

OK, sorry, there’s MY “ism,” richism. I know, that’s not a word. There’s racism, sexism, I have richism. I’m rich-ist. I have issues with rich people. Rich people who don’t use their wealth to help society in any way, or only to make themselves “look” good.

Back to the issue at hand: abortion IS an elitist issue. It is one more way for those with to push down those without. You think rich people are going to be going to jail for having illegal abortions? Of course not.

It’s also a sexist issue for sure. Rapists even get rights to the kids they spawn from their rapes these days. You can NOT convince me that’s OK. It is NOT OK to force a woman to have the child from being raped. This is one more thing that a man truly can not in any way possible remotely begin to understand. A man can be raped, but a man can not become pregnant from being raped. Have to live with it growing inside you, like the rapist is again inside you, but not for minutes this time – this time he is inside you for 9 MONTHS! Then, if you don’t give it up for adoption, you live with this child possibly for the rest of your life; remembering. If you are unlucky enough to live in one of THOSE states, you might also be FORCED to have your rapist in your life, have to see him, talk to him, etc, forever, as he is allowed to be the rightful father of your child and receive parental rights and visits. You will never be allowed to forget your pain, humiliation, and how he broke your will and spirit as the state you live in goes on to do so day after day.

Mind you, I am pro-life for myself, but pro-choice for all other women. I would never tell anyone what to do in any situation and no one else has that right either. I have never been faced with that particular scenario, and I have no idea what I’d do. Thankfully, MN would never make me deal with the father of a child from rape.

I did, however, have to make the abortion decision. Being a social worker, I knew that fetal alcohol syndrome gets part of its parts from the man’s sperm, and I became pregnant by an alcoholic. I was a pretty bad social drinker myself at the time. I had also just been in an auto accident and I was in a pretty bad amount of pain. Being born with a rare genetic disease, I also had that to consider. So, given all of that what was I about to pass on to my child? Should I or not take pain medicine? How much had I drank before I learned I was pregnant? How badly did the auto accident damage the embryo? I had several x-rays in the ER, did they do any damage?

Of course as soon as I told my boyfriend, he dumped me and took off. I quote, “I don’t want a kid who’s a freak with your genetic disease.” I was hot enough to date, but…  So, now I was also alone, single again. Guess what? I also lost my job! The accident mixed with my disease had caused 5 problems in my spine and nerve damage in my shoulder. I was super depressed and in a LOT of pain. Things that are not good for developing fetuses. Since I couldn’t pay rent, you’d better believe I was thinking of abortion. I had no idea, but was thinking every minute of what kind of damage my injured body was doing to my child. I wasn’t taking anything for the pain since that would cause more damage. I began spotting and was afraid I might lose the baby. It was then that I knew for sure that I couldn’t have an abortion.

Despite everything that could be wrong with the baby I knew I would love him. It would be against everything I believe in as a nature based pagan who reveres life to abort this thing growing inside me. If my body didn’t naturally abort it for having something wrong with it, then it was meant to be my child. That is MY belief. I don’t expect anyone else to follow my belief or force it on anyone else.

I had a bad pregnancy. Many medical issues. I was in the hospital twice with infections. Due to my disease, my son’s kicks broke 3 of my ribs. I didn’t have enough amniotic fluid. My blood pressure was too high. I was constantly in pain from injuries. I was depressed. There are many reasons a woman thinks of abortion or a doctor suggests it.

He is 20 years old now. It’s been a rough ride from all of his medical needs, but I do love him with all of my soul. I will fight for women everywhere to have their rights though. NO ONE should ever tell another person what they can and can’t do unless it comes to harming life willfully and with evil intent and forethought. AND…yet with that; what defines life? Humans can’t even agree on that!

 

There are over 100 definitions of life have been proposed, with most focusing on a handful of key attributes such as replication and metabolism. Virologists: seven processes that supposedly define life: movement, respiration, sensitivity, growth, reproduction, excretion and nutrition. Chemists: polymers – namely nucleic acids (the building blocks of DNA), proteins and polysaccharides – virtually the entire diversity of life is built. Astrobiologists: microorganisms capable of surviving in extreme environments. 

Technologists: artificial life can involve biologists creating new organisms in labs by stitching together parts of two or more existing life forms. But it can also be a little more abstract. There are even teams that are beginning to explore the creation of robots with life-like traits. Ever since the 1990s, when Thomas Ray’s Tierra computer software appeared to demonstrate the synthesis and evolution of digital “life forms”, researchers have been trying to create computer programs that truly simulate life.

Philosophers: Maybe the things we think are essential are really just peculiar to life on Earth. After all, everything from bacteria to lions is derived from a single common ancestor, meaning that on our chart of life in the Universe, we only really have one data point.

In the words of Sagan: “Man tends to define in terms of the familiar. But the fundamental truths may not be familiar.”

What a tragedy it would be if in the 2020s the new Mars rover trundles straight past a Martian, simply because it does not recognise it as being alive.

“The definition can actually hinder the search for novel life,” says Cleland. “We need to get away from our current concept, so that we are open to discovering life as we don’t know it.”

http://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20170101-there-are-over-100-definitions-for-life-and-all-are-wrong